You've GOT to be kidding me!
by the weird all women demon clan
Summary: Mauraders fic, how will three slightly different girls and one well hidden secret change the lives of our favorite group of pranksters? LilyXJames
1. Chapter 1

**Okay well this is our first ever Marauders fic! Well let me think about what I have to put in this little AN, uh… flames and reviews are always welcome and encouraged! Also check out our other fics and uh… keep in mind that Harry Potter belongs to the very talented and amazing J.K Rowling. The only thing that actually belongs to me is the OC named Ryoko, the other OCs belong to my friends. **

**Chapter one! **

**On with da' fun! **

"Sirius!" James Potter, Remus Lupin and Peter Pettigrew yelled at the same time throwing open the compartment door as they saw their best friend.

"James! Remus! Peter!" they all started to laugh like they were apart for longer than three days.

"So new school year huh?" Sirius said rubbing his hands together diabolically while thinking perverted thoughts as usual. His friends sighed before Remus took out a book and James started to tell Peter more about Lily Evans as Peter listened to every word like he never heard the stories before. Sirius looked around before deciding that he had to do something Marauders-ish (in other words, stupid beyond reason)

"What are you plotting Sirius?" Remus asked as Sirius looked at him slightly shocked before asking,

"Who me, plot? Never!" every other boy in the compartment at the same time said in defeated voices,

"oh no." he smiled before leaving the compartment.

Down three compartments

"Um… is it okay if we sit here?" a voice asked Lily Evans as she looked up from her book and looked to who was talking to her. The first girl who she saw had silver hair in pigtails and Japanese skin tone. She had amber eyes and a blue skirt with a flower design in the corner and a blue shirt with a similar design on it as well. Next to her was a taller girl with jet black hair and violet eyes. She too had a Japanese skin tone and wore a pair of blue jeans and a purple shirt with 'Innocent Angel?' written in pink. The last girl was the second tallest and too had silver hair, except hers was dyed at the tips and two other pieces a dark red. She had amber eyes and wore a pair of dark jeans and a 'Star Wars' tee shirt

(AN/ I'm pretty sure that the original Star Wars came out, but because the time period is kinda unsure I'm just going to guess that it's bout 1973-1975 uh… that's it –Ryoko)

"Sure, go ahead, I'm Lily by the way, Lily Evans." The girls smiled before bowing slightly and saying in unison,

"Konnichiha." Lily looked slightly confused before the dark haired girl smiled and said innocently,

"Um… we mean greetings. I'm Dita, and these are my friends Ryoko and Sasami." Sasami smiled (being the shorter girl with pure silver hair)

"It's nice to meet you Lily-san." She sat down as Dita let out a small kitten to let it play on the floor.

"Excuse me, Dita?" Dita looked up before nodded to show that she was listening, "Why is you cat purple?" Dita looked to her kitten before explaining,

"She's a magical cat, I bought her back home and she never gets any bigger and will always be purple. Her name is Sumomo by the way." Lily nodded before petting the kitten and asked the Japanese girls,

"What does Sumomo mean anyway?" Ryoko who had been relatively silent looked up and answered,

"Little plum." Lilly nodded before saying half way between sarcastic and serious,

"Befitting name." all at once they heard numerous screaming and cheers from the train corridor as lily rolled her eyes and muttered something that sounded to Dita, Sasami and Ryoko like "Marauders" they walked into the hallway before seeing two boys about their age running down the hallway naked. The taller one had tanned skin and black hair, he had dark eyes and was followed by a slightly shorter boy with messy black hair and hazel eyes.

"JAMES POTTER AND SIRIUS BLACK!" Lily yelled at the both tried to stop only then to crash into the girls, Sirius landed on top of Dita as he held her wrist down and straddled her hips as James fell onto Lily a similar (if not identical) way. Ryoko and Sasami started to laugh before two other boys (both clothed) walked down the hallway next and stopped by Sirius and James. One had pale skin and light brown hair with dark amber eyes, the next one was short and stocky with a pointed nose and dark brown hair. They both wore black cloaks with a crest on the left side of a roaring lion with a fancy 'G' on it with muggle clothing underneath.

"Hello Remus, Peter. I thought I asked you to keep Black and Potter under control until we got to school." She asked in a serious a looming voice that could make a grown man whimper in fear.

"you know Sasami, Dita has been pinned down for at least two minutes and she hasn't said a word. Hehe!" Ryoko said to Sasami, trying to make sure that Dita would not notice.

But of course Dita heard and looked up at the man who was still on top of her, "shimatta (damn it in Japanese)! Get off of me and for the love of kami (god) put some pants on!" Dita screamed using all her might to get out of the death hold.

Sasami and Ryoko sighed, until Ryoko saw a familiar book in the hand of one of the boys actually fully clothed. "Aremaa (something like oh my god)! Is that 'The Wizard of Oz'! I love that book. I've read it a million times!" Remus looked at her oddly.

"Really, I've lost count of how many times I've read it but I really like it. My name is Remus. Forgive me for judging but you don't seem like a person who reads that much." Ryoko shrugged while Sasami tried to stifle her laughter.

"That is what everybody says! The funny thing is that she reads a lot but absolutely hates school, how ironic. This is Ryoko, the one on the ground is Dita and I'm the fabulous Sasami!" Sasami said in her usual child's voice even though all the girls looked about 17.

"if you don't mind me asking, what is with all the weird words." The pointy-nosed boy finally joined in on the conversation.

"we come from a different country, we'll just let you guess!" Sasami winked as she did her famous pose that Ryoko called anime worthy.

"oh, I don't know… Canada! Yea that sounds right!" James Potter said while finally getting off of Lily.

Sasami laughed while Ryoko put her hands on her hips, "what a baka.(idiot)" the screaming behind them got louder as they saw that Dita and Sirius were still on the floor.

"Will you stop with all the mumbojumbo words? I don't even know if you're insulting me or not! What is your name by the way?" Sirius looked down at the girl who he still straddled.

"My name is none of your business! And even if I spoke in English I doubt that your small little mind would be able to comprehend what I say. Kami (god) you're heavy and this really does not help with my personal space issues. Let me say something that you might understand… GET OFF OF ME!" Dita face was turning red with anger.

Ryoko finally thought it was a good time to step in, "we have to go get dressed so do you mind getting off my friend!" Ryoko said while almost throwing Sirius across the room. Lily helped Dita up and apologized that the boys', mainly Sirius', rude behavior.

"Wow Ryo, you knocked him out what have I told you about using too much strength." Sasami said pointing towards the now unconscious Sirius. Ryoko gave a look that probably meant whatever and walked into the compartment followed by Lily, Dita, and Sasami.

At Hogwarts!

"Welcome to another year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry!" Albus Dumbledore announced standing at the head table before a large group of both new and old students.

"Now, because of the amount of students dropping out of schools in Japan, Israel and America we will be having older students join us for the term, now let us start the sorting ceremony!" Professor McGonagall walked away from the large table before unrolling the parchment she was to read from.

"When I call your name, you will be sorted into your houses… Chiba, Dita!" Dita slowly and cautiously walked to the old beaten up pointed hat. It was placed on her head when a whisper entered her mind. "hmm, interesting…well there is a good amount of loyalty and friendship in you almost like a Ravenclaw but the best choice would be GRYFFINDOR!" Dita stood and started to walk to the cheering table, which she guessed was Gryffindor. She was happy to see Lily waving at her but the person behind her made her mood go sour. Sirius and the other three boys, ah yes this school year was going to be just _fabulous._

"Denton, Ryoko!" McGonagall yelled. Ryoko walked up to the stool and looked at the hat before sighing and sitting down.

"well let me think, you would do wonderful in Slytherin, I believe you would like it there, however I see a great deal of bravery and loyalty. Not to mention your little secret. I think the best choice would have to be… GRYFFINDOR!" Ryoko sighed happily and went to sit with Remus, Lily and Dita.

"Up next is Tsukino, Sasami." Sasami walked up the stairs before eagerly sitting down and having the hat placed on her head.

"hum… Hufflepuff I have to say would welcome you with open arms but I see you need to help your friend so I'll say Gryffindor!" Sasami happily ran down the stairs to her friends before McGonagall read off the next name to the horror of Lily Evans…

**well that's it for this chapter! If you want to know more all you have to do is send in a review! Oh yeah in case we forgot to mention the couples in this fic are… **

**Lily X James **

**Dita X Sirius **

**Ryoko X Remus **

**Sasami X OC **

**Your loyal authoresses, **

**Dita and Ryoko! (mostly Ryoko) **

**Dita: I helped a little! You should be happy I'm grounded! **

**Ryoko: not my fault! **


	2. Chapter 2

**Okay well welcome to chapter two of 'You've got to be kidding me' well we hope you like our fic so far and keep in mind that we do not own anyone in this fic except for the OCs. Well keep in mind that we loooooove reviews and even the occasional flame. **

**To our oh so wonderful and fabulous reviewers! **

**cosmopolitan: I'm glad you liked it! **

**sugar high water uma: ahhh! A loyal reviewer! Welcome to our new fic! **

**Qoheleth: thank you oh so much! I wasn't sure when the original Star Wars came out that that helped a whole lot! **

**Chapter two **

**On with da' fun! **

"Evans, Briar." A taller boy with dark red hair and striking green eyes walked up to the stool as Dita looked to Lily who still had her face hidden in her hands,

"Brother?" Dita asked, already seeing her older brother Yoshi waiting to be sorted. Lily nodded before James tried to comfort her before she glared at him and slapped his hand that was going towards her shoulder.

"RAVENCLAW!" the hat called out as Briar pouted and ran to his sister and hugged her before yelling out,

"Oh baby sister! I know we'll finally have time to get to know each other but now I must leave you! So be good and know your big brother Briar is here for you!" Lily glared at her brother

"I thought I got rid of you when you got that scholarship at the American year round school! Please just leave me alone." Lily shook her head.

"Oh don't say that Lily! You know that you just could not wait to see your wonderful brother's face again! Oh are you one of Lily's friends." Briar said taking Sasami's hand, " Enchantee, mademoiselle!" he leaned down and kissed her hand.

"BLOODY HELL BROTHER, GO SIT WITH THE RAVENCLAWS AND LEAVE US ALONE!" Lily stood up screaming making the entire school look at her.

"Miss Evans do you have anything more to say or will you allow us to continue the sorting" McGonagall said giving Lily a death look. Briar thought it would be a good time to walk to the Ravenclaw table, while Lily sat in her seat.

"So you three are from Israel" James said trying to break the silence and talked to the three new girls. Dita, Sasami, and Ryoko's mouth dropped open,

"So it must be America then!" Dita started knock her head on the table, while Ryoko strangled an imaginary neck the fact that it actually the fact that the head turned out to be Sirius' neck is a whole different story.

"Man, I am stumped!"

"Kami! We are from Japan you nitwit! You know Japan, the little island with great food, Mount Fuji, and Anime. Ah man! Now I so have a craving for rice balls!" Ryoko said frustratingly.

"I would have never guessed!" James said scratching the back of his head.

"What an idiot!" Lily said smacking the back of his head. Professor McGonagall started to turn red before yelling at the Gryffindor table,

"SORTING! CEREMONY!" the school went quiet before she took her parchment again before reading off another new student,

"Chiba, Yoshi." Ryoko and Sasami started to laugh before seeing Dita hide her face in her hands as a boy with slightly curly black hair and violet eyes walk to the sorting hat.

"Ravenclaw!" he looked at Dita before seeing the four boys sitting next to her as his over-protective big brother-ness started to kick in.

"Please go to the other Ravenclaws." McGonagall ordered to avoid another incident.

"Denton, Aoshi." Ryoko sighed before seeing her 12 year old sister walk on stage, she had silver hair in a high ponytail and golden eyes but looked nothing like her older sister, she smirked and had the hat placed on her head.

"Slytherin!" the hat yelled out as Aoshi sat down Dita leaned over to Ryoko and asked,

"Isn't she the uh… um…" Ryoko sighed before finishing,

"She's the slut." Sirius looked up from the table at the word 'slut' and looked to see who they were talking about.

"Down boy, she's twelve." Sirius seemed to be weighing his options before moving slightly closer to Dita as she was completely oblivious.

"Well, we will now start the official sorting… Aminda, Marc." A short first year with a paler skin tone walked forward nervously and sat at the stool as he was instantly sorted into Hufflepuff. The group under the yellow and black banner clapped as professor McGonagall read off the names,

"Brock, Kyle."

"Hufflepuff"

"Clark, Tye"

"Gryffindor"

"Galtman, Mei"

"Ravenclaw"

"Godel, Lia"

"Gryffindor"

"Han, Grace"

"Slytherin."

Jackson… Jann… Katz… Lauzus… Lightcap… Magee… Magen… McGullicutty… Smith…Tillinger… Weber." Were all sorted into their houses as the sorting ended with Zaslow, Cory.

Professor Dumbledore stood up again before tapping on his goblet for the school to settle down.

"A few words before the feast can start… ah… who am I joking? I'm as hungry as you all are, food first then announcements." As the last word left his mouth the tables suddenly filled with every kind of food imaginable.

"So, are you excited about the new year?" Dita asked Lily before gasping and seeing her all time favorite food sitting on the table.

"(Japanese word for rice balls)!" Dita yelled out taking one for herself and finding that they were plain as a piece of paper appeared on the table,

_Tap one with your wand and say what flavor you would like, personally I find the plum flavored most enjoyable._

_-Professor Flitwick _

_Charms _

Dita smiled before tapping her wand and calling out,

"Apple" James and Sirius both looked to each other as they picked up the omusubi (rice ball) and looked to Ryoko who was eating some dumplings with chop sticks before responding without looking at them,

"Rice ball." Sasami started to eat some lo mien as she started to talk to one of the first years by the name of Zoë McGilicutty, she had bleach blond hair, tanned skin and violet eyes, she was rather short for her age and wiry.

"So where are you from?" Sasami asked as Zoë took a bite out of her dinner before answering simply,

"The ninja island of Mei's world." A few people laughed before another girl with rather messy boy short black hair and olive skin walked next to the Gryffindor table, the robes she wore indicated that she was a Ravenclaw but Zoë seemed to know her.

"Now, now Boy… no telling of our world just yet." Ryoko laughed slightly before standing up and bowing to the new girl,

"Konnichiha." The Ravenclaw smiled and bowed back before asking Zoë,

"You gonna write that part for me yet?" Zoë shrugged before the olive skinned girl sighed and sat down while poking Zoë to make her want to write something,

"Are all you American's weird?" Sirius asked looping his arm around Dita as she went paler and slapped his hand before throwing him over her shoulder as he landed on his back while she pressed her sneaker into his chest,

"Okay a little tip for you… ONE do not ever I shall repeat DO NOT EVER touch me! And TWO me and Ryoko are part American so you insult them I will kill you plain and simple." The great hall burst into laughter as Sirius stood up and walked back to the table.

"Are you okay Padfoot?" Remus asked as Ryoko started to laugh as Dita sat down as well and continued to eat her rice ball.

"I'm fine Moony." Sirius said rubbing his shoulder as Sasami started to laugh,

"Do you find this amusing?" Sirius asked a little short of a bark as Sasami nodded and explained,

"That was the second time a girl threw you across the room. I think that's funny." Before Sirius could reply to Sasami, Professor Dumbledore stood up and called out,

"A message to all students that the Forbidden Forest did not get that name for no reason, it is off limits to every student." As Dumbledore spoke his light blue eyes for some reason went to the Marauders who were (with the exception of Remus) were plotting different things to do.

"Also know that the Shrieking Shack in Hogsmead is still haunted and anyone who goes near shall receive a harmful and painful demise, oh that note I would like to say classes start on Monday and to get a good nights sleep." Every student stood up and started to go towards the large doors and to their houses.

**Okay I know that, that was a crappy ending but I'm staying home from school today with a fever and sore throat so you can expect more very, very soon. **

**Dita: you better! **

**Ryoko: (muttering under breath) bitch**

**Dita: I heard that! (Attacks Ryoko with a hair brush) **

**Ryoko: oh crap, it's Canada all over again! **

**Your loyal writer, **

**Ryoko **


	3. Chapter 3

**Okay well welcome one and all the chapter three! **

**Dita: Ryoko, the disclaimer please. **

**Ryoko: what? What are you talking about? I own Harry Potter **

**Sasami: no you don't! **

**Ryoko: (hugs Remus) sure I do! **

**Dita: no Dr. Pepper or pocky if you don't write it. **

**Ryoko: (lets go of Remus) I do not own Harry Potter, cause if I did… well why the hell would I be writing a fan fiction? **

**To the person/people who reviewed! **

**sugar high water uma: well thank you, in fact I am feeling better! And Sirius is a bit of a wuss but both times he completely deserved to get thrown. As for awesome power… well yeah I hereby bestow reviewer powers upon you. Go you and your shibby self. **

**aimiegirl02: well we will review as soon as possible and I'm pretty sure it's spelled kawaii but whatever. **

**harry-an-ginny: yeah well Tabby (who Sasami is based on) refused to be with Peter or anyone else who I could think of, so we decided to make Lily have a brother. **

**Other notes: don't forget that flames and reviews are oh so very helpful and will be used to keep my bedroom warm. **

**Chapter three**

**On with da' fun! **

"Welcome to Gryffindor common room!" Sirius called as the portrait of the woman in the pink dress opened and revealed room, it was large with fireplace on the far wall with 'Hogwarts' Gryffindor House' etched on it in fancy letters. There were multiple tables with four chairs at each and a light in the middle along with scarlet couches and a red carpet with the Gryffindor crest in the center. The students walked in as the first years went to see where they would be sleeping as Sirius, James, Peter and Remus went to the couches and started to look over what looked to be a blank sheet of parchment.

"Here, follow me." Lily said with a smile as she led the Japanese girls up a set of stairs to a large wooden door.

"You knock six times to get to the sixth year dormitory." Lily knocked as the door opened as revealed a large circular room. There were about fourteen beds following the shape of the room with trunks at the foot, identical scarlet blankets and gold pillows adorned each bed. There was a door on the other side of the room as Lily pointed to a large armoire and showed Ryoko, Dita and Sasami how it worked.

"You tap it with your wand and say your name, try it." Ryoko stepped forward with her wand, tapped it while saying clearly,

"Ryoko Denton." The girls heard a small pop as they opened it and saw Ryoko's uniforms on one side and her regular clothes on the other side.

"That's so cool." Dita said as Lily closed the doors and let Dita try.

"Dita Chiba" she said while tapping the doors as her clothes appeared. Sasami looked around the room before finding her trunk and started to pull out her favorite stuffed dog named 'Mr. Ruff-Ruff' she placed it lovingly on the pillows as Lily, Ryoko, Dita and Sasami went back down to the common room at the same time Sirius was coming back through the portrait hole with bottles of butter beer under his arms.

"Black, what are you doing?" Lily asked sitting down on a different couch than the Marauders.

"We're just going to play a game Evans. Why don't you play too? It's called 'never have I ever'" Lily shrugged before Remus turned to Ryoko, Dita and Sasami before asking.

"Would you want to play as well?" Dita sat down before nodding and telling him,

"Hai" Peter smile before shaking his head,

"Again with the mumbo-jumbo words, can we assume that meant yes?" Ryoko smiled before Sirius handed out the butter beer and explained the game.

"We go around in a circle and you name something that you never did, if anyone else did it, then they take a drink. The first person to get drunk, pass out of have to go to the bathroom is out. Last person standing is the winner." Everyone nodded as Sirius started,

"Never have I ever… been in Slytherin." No one drank as it was Dita's turn.

"Never have I ever… acted on the urge to run around on a train naked." Dita glared at Sirius as he and James took a drink from their butter beer. Dita looked to Lily as she thought for a second,

"Never have I ever liked a guy with glasses." Dita, Sasami and Ryoko laughed as they drank from their bottles while James started to complain,

"But what about the intelligent look Evans?" Lily rolled her eyes before telling him in a matter-of-fact voice,

"You would have to be intelligent to have an intelligent look Potter." James leaned back on the couch before muttering under his breath,

"If I didn't like you so much, I'd hate you." Lily looked to Sasami as she tried to think of a good one,

"Never have I ever been straddled by someone who I didn't know for more than two minutes." Dita glared at her friend before taking a drink. Remus thought of one for his turn as he admitted,

"Never have I ever been out of England." Peter took a drink as Sirius pointed to Ryoko,

"Your turn." Ryoko stroked her chin diabolically as she clapped her hands and said,

"Never have I ever gone one day without reading." Remus and Ryoko were the only ones who did not take a drink as Sirius threw a pillow at the both of them and laughed,

"Go on Pete." Remus said as Peter thought for a second and admitted in a small voice,

"Never have I ever lost my virginity." Sirius started to laugh before yelling loudly,

"And you probably never will." James, Sirius and Ryoko took a drink of their butter beer as Dita smacked Ryoko upside the head,

"Cause you were being a baka." Peter pointed to James as he admitted,

"Never have I ever read a book cover to cover." Remus, Ryoko, Dita, Sasami, Lily and peter took a drink as they continued to go in a circle.

"Never have I ever gotten so drunk that I woke up with a tattoo of unknown origin." Sirius said as Remus and Ryoko took drinks.

"What!" Dita yelled as Ryoko turned around to show Dita the back of her neck, there was a five pointed star in a circle as Dita sighed and started to smack her own head on the arm of the couch she was sitting on. It was then that everyone turned to Remus as he sighed and showed them his side where a grey wolf was tattooed.

"Never have I ever… turned the whole common room into a fort." James said as Ryoko took a drink.

"Never have I ever been to a disco club." Dita said laughing as Remus tried to hide the fact that he was taking a drink from his butter beer.

"What?" Ryoko said shocked as Remus told her in a serious voice,

"I like to get on with my groovy self." Everyone started to laugh as Lily jumped up to run to the bathroom as Sirius yelled out,

"And Evans is out of the game!" Dita looked to Sasami as she smirked evilly towards Ryoko and said,

"Never have I ever super glued a teachers butt to a chair." James and Ryoko took a drink as it was Remus' turn,

"Never have I ever been on McGonagall's 'most likely to never graduate as long as I'm deputy headmistress' list" James and Sirius took a drink as Dita poked Ryoko,

"Drink."

"What? I'm not!" Dita looked at her friend odd before telling her,

"You will soon enough." Ryoko glared at her and took her own turn,

"Never have I ever liked the Beatles." At this point James, peter, Sirius and Remus jumped up and tackled Ryoko while pretending to hit her while singing 'Yellow Submarine' Ryoko stood up after pushing the Brits off her as it was Peter's turn.

"Never have I ever been skinny dipping." James, Sirius, Ryoko, Sasami, Dita and Remus all drank their butter beer. James stood up and announced,

"Never have I ever had a dieing love for a teacher!" Sasami drank from her bottle as everyone else gagged; Sirius took another bottle before telling everyone one,

"Never have I ever gotten a tattoo." Dita, Remus and Ryoko drank as everyone looked at responsible Dita with large eyes; she lifted up her shirt slightly to show the small of her back that read 'Leo' along with a small lion on it. She stood up before falling down and laughing as Ryoko announced

"She's drunk." Dita covered her mouth to try to stifle a hiccup as she said seriously,

"No I'm not… I swear to drunk I'm not god." Ryoko rolled her eyes before helping her friend up the girls' dormitory stairs; she knocked six times on the door as it opened. Lily walked out of the bathroom with a toothbrush as she smiled and helped Dita into her bed.

"You still playing?" Lily asked as Ryoko nodded and gave Dita her favorite bear named Riven. Ryoko ran back down as Sasami was taking her turn.

"Never have I ever obsessed over a real person." Shouts of 'come on!' filled the room as everyone took a drink.

"Never have I ever liked Japanese food." Remus admitted as Ryoko and Sasami jumped on him as he fell off the couch, Sasami was able to keep her balance as Ryoko fell on top of him while straddling his hips.

"Ow." Remus said rubbing his head as Ryoko smacked him gently and got up. All the while trying to hide the slight blush on her cheeks,

"Go Ryo." Sasami said as Ryoko sat back down,

"Never have I ever gotten a detention of British soil." The Marauders drank as it went to Peter.

"Never have I ever, gotten anything pierced." Ryoko and Sasami drank as James asked,

"Where?" Ryoko pointed to her ears what had two apiece and stuck out her tongue that had a small stud on the end. Sasami pointed to her ears that had five on one and three on the other.

"Dita has her belly button pierced!" Sasami laughed. Everyone looked to James as he thought and said,

"Never have I ever… oh bloody hell!" he ran to the boys' dormitory as loud retching was heard through the walls.

"Well Potter's out." Ryoko said taking an extra drink as it went back to Sirius.

"Never have I ever… damn, damn, damn!" he yelled going towards the bathroom as well to throw up.

"And then there were four." Ryoko said as it was Sasami's turn.

"Never have I ever had a detention." Ryoko and Remus drank as it went to Remus,

"Never have I ever talked back to a teacher." Ryoko drank before saying,

"Never have I ever won this game." She ran to the girls' dormitory before Sasami started to smile and looked to the only other people left playing,

"Never have I ever failed a class," peter admitted as Sasami drank. Remus went while looking at both Sasami and peter,

"Never have I ever gotten drunk off of butter beer." They both drank before Remus went to the boys' dormitory to check on Sirius and James.

"Did Remus just win?" Peter asked Sasami who was asleep already.

**Well that's it for chapter three! **

**Hope you like it and don't forget to review and or flame. **

**Your loyal writer, **

**Ryoko **


	4. Chapter 4

**Welcome one and all to chapter four of 'You've GOT to be kidding me!' **

**Disclaimer: we no own, you no sue. **

**To our wonderful reviewers!!! **

**huge euge: well here's your chapter! –lol- you know, force is very helpful when you want something. **

**sugar high water uma: thanks! We play that game a lot, only with soda or fingers (who ever has done something has to stick up one finger, first to ten loses) 'cause Dita would kill us if we really used alcohol, **

**Dita: yeah, I would hunt you down and catch you like a fish! Also I'm glad to hear you are using your amazing reviewing powers for good! **

**Sapphire Pear Drop: oooh money!!! Well the thousand would help… a lot, but you don't have to, I'd end up spending it all on like a wand and anime mangas. **

**aznchic2009: thanks! Strange but cool, sounds like me and my friends!! **

**harry-an-ginny: why thank you! **

**miz-attitude: thank you!!! **

**Chapter four **

**On with da' fun! **

Dita picked up her head uneasily as she thought it would explode.

"Ow, Ow, oh Kami Ow!" she said sitting up and seeing Sumomo look at her with her large violet kitten eyes.

"Go get Ryoko-chan." Dita said softly as Sumomo nudged Dita on the arm, if Sumomo was known for one thing it's getting Dita out of bed. Dita laid down and yelled out like a little kid,

"Ryoko-chan, I need your help." Ryoko opened the curtains with her pet rat Chii on her shoulder.

"With what?" Ryoko asked setting Chii down with Sumomo before jumping on the bed.

"What's up?" Dita clutched her head before asking,

"You drank more than me, why aren't you in pain?" Ryoko smiled before getting up and pulling out a box with a white Jolly Rodger on it.

"What's that?" Dita asked as Ryoko pulled out a light green bottle and held it to Dita's nose.

"That smells disgusting!" Ryoko took it away from her friend before telling her,

"It's to help your head, drink it and you'll feel better." After weighting her options Dita stole the bottle from her friend, held her nose and gulped down the mixture as it seemed to refill itself.

"I don't want to know why you have that." Ryoko picked up Randi before going to Sasami and Lily.

"Evans-san, you up?" Ryoko asked as the red haired girl shook her head, "Drink this and it'll make you all better." Lily sat up and took the green vile. Ryoko set down Chii before going to Sasami's bed and seeing it was empty.

"Where's Sasam'-chan?" Ryoko asked as Dita jumped out of her bed and looked around. Lily and Ryoko walked down the stairs to see Sasami asleep on the couch. They went back up the stairs, knowing it would be best to leave her alone.

"What to do today?" Dita asked going to the armoire tapping it with her wand and muttering

"Chiba Dita." She took out a pair of jeans and a kimono top that was purple with pink flowers on it and a pair of purple slippers.

"Any quidditch here?" Ryoko asked as Lily nodded and asked in a defeated voice,

"Don't' tell me your obsessive quidditch freak like Potter and Black are you?" Ryoko shook her head and took out her own clothes that included a pair of black kimono pants and an orange tank top with black Jolly Rodger on it along with a pair of black flip-flops.

"You really don't like Black-san and Potter-san do you Evans-san?" Ryoko asked as Lily glared at her slightly and nodded,

"I never liked them, they're annoying, they're rude and they're well… Sirius and James!" she yelled as Ryoko and Dita looked at each other and stepped away from the pissed witch.

Ryoko looked around before grabbing Chii and starting to stroke the rat's fur. Lily went to the closet next before pulling out a white skirt that turns green as it goes to the bottom and a green shirt that matched her eyes.

"How bout you Evans-san? You play quidditch?" Lily nodded and took out a book. The three walked down the girls' dormitory stairs before seeing Sasami about to wake up.

"**gu-tenmorugen (good morning)**" Ryoko said before jumping onto Sasami as she growled slightly.

"What you an inu (dog) now?" Sasami sat up before going to the girls' dormitory and to her own bed. Dita took a small stick out of her pocket before tapping on it with her wand as it grew to a broomstick.

"Which one is that?" Lily asked taking a-hold of the broom as Dita responded,

"Nimbus one thousand fifty." James, Sirius, peter and Remus walked down the boys dormitory next, James and Sirius with broom sticks, Remus with a book and peter empty handed. Dita shrunk her broom before walking with her new friends and Ryoko towards the Great Hall as Lily saw an oh-too familiar Ravenclaw and tried to hide behind James.

"Good morning baby sister!" Briar yelled throwing his arms around Lily as she started to yell,

"Get your hands off me Briar!" he let go before looking around for Sasami before Lily noticed and got a sudden idea.

"Hey big brother, do you think you could oh I don't know… LEAVE ME ALONE?" Briar pouted slightly before hugging Lily again and running off to some other Ravenclaws, one even being Yoshi, Dita's older brother.

"I love how kind you are to each other." Ryoko said sarcastically as she was hugged from behind.

"Oomph!" she yelled as she fell onto the ground. She started to growl as Sirius, James and Dita started to laugh as loud as they could, Remus and Lily glared at them as Remus helped her up.

"What do you want Aoshi?" Ryoko asked as her little sister as Aoshi stood up,

"Just going to remind you about something" the fair-haired younger girl said looking at Sirius before waving slightly,

"Konnichiha." She said in her best sexy voice that would usually send boys to their knees.

"Aoshi, this is Evans-san, Potter-san, Black-san, Pettigrew-san, and Lupin-san. This is my **shisuta (sister), Aoshi." Peter glared before yelling, **

**"No more mumbo-jumbo words! Also just call us Lily, James, Sirius, Peter and Remus! Not Evans-san or whatever it is." Peter yelled desperately as Aoshi slowly backed away and went to talk to her Slytherin friends. Dita looked to the Brits before explaining, **

**"It's rude to call you your given name." Ryoko and Sasami nodded as Sasami added, **

**"We don't know you that well so it's really impolite to call someone their second name." Peter scratched his head before Sirius asked, **

**"Second name?" Ryoko sighed before trying to help her friends, **

**"In Japan your last name goes first then your first name." Sirius got a perverted look in his eyes before walking to Dita and asking, **

**"So you'll call me Sirius when you know me better?" Dita looked over the perverted Marauder before nodding, "So would you like to know me better?" Dita smacked him across the face, **

**"I don't think so." She muttered, walking with her friends as Sirius rubbed his cheek. The group of odd students made their way to the Great Hall, laughing over the red hand print of Sirius' face. **

**"Ryo-chan?" Sasami started before asking quietly in Japanese 'Will you be okay later in the month?' Ryoko nodded, while seeing Peter glare. **

**"Repeat after me, 'Hello my name is Sasami. I am sixteen years old. I am a witch." Peter moved her jaw as Sasami started to laugh. **

**"I'm very proud of my culture Pettigrew-san." Sasami told him while grinning. "Why should we abandon it, just for a new school?" she asked, while looking to her friend's for support. **

**"That wouldn't be very nice." Ryoko told them, while pushing open the large doors. The four main tables were set up again as they saw some students eating. Peter ran to the table as the rest followed, **

**"So hungry!" Sirius called, while holding onto his thin stomach for emphasis. Lily started to talk to Dita about classes, as Ryoko joked with Remus about the similarities between 'Lord of the Flies' and World War II. **

**"It was completely intended of course." Ryoko urged, sitting next to her new friend. Remus smiled before listing **

**"Ralph was the Western man, Jack the Hitler and even the mulberry faced boy had his own part in it." They smiled while he passed her a plate of food. Dita and Sasami started to poke at some things, while trying to figure out what they were. **

**"Something wrong with your pancakes?" James asked, as Ryoko poked it again. **

**"What is it? it's kinda poofy, not flat, but smells kinda good." Dita and Ryoko had a mixed heritage, but raised in mainly Japanese homes. Sasami took her chop sticks while trying to pick up one of the pancakes. **

**"This isn't working!" she yelled, as Peter took his fork and stabbed the golden brown breakfast. **

**"There you go!" he smiled, putting it on her plate. **

**"Knives at a table, isn't that a little barbaric?" she asked, while having Peter cut it into pieces. **

**"They look really weird." Dita told them, while pouring some pumpkin juice into her cup. **

**"But they taste fantastic!" Sasami yelled, eating as many as would fit in her mouth. Ryoko and Dita looked to each other before trying it for their own. **

**"Don't worry, we'll Brit-i-fy you guys soon enough." Peter told them, as Ryoko socked him in the arm. **

**"Don't think so Pettigrew-san." The table started to laugh as others filed in. **

**well I think that's it for this! **

**Erm… changes to the pairings. **

**Dita/Sirius (same)**

**Lily/James (true blue for ever)**

**Sasami/Remus (different)**

**And…**

**Ryoko/Severus (wayyy different) **

**Sorry it took so long everyone! Keep in mind that we still love all of you, and hope that you can find it in your hearts to forgive our non-loyal-ness. **

**Your so-called loyal authoress, **

**Ryoko **


End file.
